You have to start somewhere

May I begin by saying what a fantastic run I had at Fab. My first full-time job after college, I started off as a “Crackerjack,” a term coined for Fab’s unique customer service representatives. As difficult and sometimes less-than-enjoyable as it was, I quickly grew very close to my new coworkers and acquired some valuable skills. I’d like to advise here that you please be as courteous as you can to any future customer service type person you encounter; trust me, you catch more flies with honey. Months later, I was promoted to Assistant Buyer for Women’s Accessories, Health & Beauty, a role which later grew into being the only assistant for the entire Women’s department. My two years at Fab brought so many wonderful, talented, and generally awesome people into my life. Sometimes on a Monday, going to work felt like going to high school—you are bummed that the weekend is over but excited to see your friends; you couldn’t wait to grab coffees in the kitchen to re-hash Saturday’s party or compare late night adventures in Brooklyn. Most people were friends outside of the office, and we all genuinely enjoyed each other’s company. At lunch, if you were able to break away from your desk, we sat down at large tables and ate cafeteria-style on a separate floor, waiting in long lines for buffets of various Manhattan restaurant fair—it was sometimes quite the madhouse. What a wonderful madness it was though, as cheesy as it sounds we did become to feel like a family.

Then came the layoffs. All three rounds of them. In July, the New York office watched as the Berlin office was slowly dismantled. I was home in San Diego during the second round of layoffs, which affected both Berlin and NYC. I received a sad and poetically dramatic phone call that confirmed the news that I was still employed. A large majority of my friends (this newly formed family, you’ll recall) were unfortunately no longer employed. It wasn’t until I returned from a wonderful weekend in San Francisco that I walked into our open floor plan office and slowly began to absorb the impact of the layoffs. Close to half of the desks were empty—abandoned as depressing time capsules and reminders of the fallen.

In true Fab fashion, we were expected to adapt to the changes and move forward. Things were crazy for a while, calmed down, and then became too calm. In my last month or so, I was editing photos, uploading copy, and merchandising entire categories myself. Everyone that remained had to pick up the slack and cover for other departments as well, which was not easy, however we worked and learned together.

Mid-November brought the third round of layoffs. This was a much more public and personal firing than the previous rounds, as we were pulled into a glass office one by one and given a white packet. It was like watching your friends get sent to the firing squad. Then it was over, and we all hugged and cried and laughed, lots of feelings all bubbling up at once from all parties. My boss and I proceeded to go to our favorite Barre class at Equinox, and then joined the majority of the company at a beer garden, in true Fab fashion. It was a brutal day, but I do believe that I am better because of it. I gladly welcomed what I had affectionately called my “Straight Chillin’” packet, knowing that I wasn’t really happy at Fab anymore. Yes, the amazing severance didn’t hurt either. Everyone that was let go that day will go on to better things, in fact some already have. While it’s tough to comprehend sometimes, I do truly believe that everything in life does happen for a reason.

Since that fateful November 14th, I have been living the dream, my friends. While everyone undoubtedly stressed about balancing work with the holidays, I welcomed the season with open arms. Thanksgiving was lovely, and I spent the rest of early December baking, working out, cooking, and just enjoying time to myself (yet somehow my apartment was still as never clean as it should have been…). I met with a few people about my resume and career goals, but I didn’t put much effort into the job hunt at that point.

After changing my flights no less than four times, I ended up spending over two glorious weeks at home in San Diego, from mid-December until the day before New Year’s Eve. I was able to get in a lot of family time. I saw more people from various stages in my life than I could have ever imagined; it was truly wonderful. My visit to San Diego brought what I’m not sure was either an awareness of or a shift in perspective, but it made me take a good look at what I value and what my priorities for a happy, healthy life should be.

And this, my friends, is where we come to the present. I am at a strange point in my life, where I hope I can grow from this experience and make the absolute best of it. I have realized that may include a new career path, possibly a sizeable pay cut, and at some point in the future, a departure from the East Coast. To say that I am confused would be a massive understatement, however I am trying to stay positive on all fronts. I have been in a fantasy-travel world for a bit, and I am visiting a friend in Switzerland next week (!!), however after that it’s truly time to focus.

I thank you for reading and beginning this new journey with me. I hope not to bore you, and to hopefully help improve your life as I work to improve mine. Oh, and I promise the rest of the posts will be much shorter than this :)


Xo
Amanda Q